Sunday, December 4, 2016

Shorctomings in domestic service

As a recent flood has caused our living situation into total disarray, I've found myself reflecting on a bit of the history with T and I as well as my role as a submissive within it.

When I was new to the lifestyle there were certain aspects that drew me in immediately (e.g. bondage) while others were completely foreign ideas as to why the hell someone would willingly subject themselves to them, let alone seek them out (e.g. chastity, domestic service, etc.).

As things accelerated quickly I began to adopt the mentality of "anything that makes her life easier and more pleasant is good."  Not long after it became very easy to swallow the concept of domestic service.  To put it bluntly, I hate cleaning.  I hate cleaning a lot.  There is something I hate more than cleaning: the thought of her having to clean in my place.

It wasn't long before I embraced this... and soon after (both with K and F) I began to look forward to all roles that displayed my submission, both sexual and not.  The status and interplay between a domestic servant and their Mistress is very arousing, even when thinking about it in non-sexual terms.  The servant's role is to exist for others.  They are (usually) treated as a human but not an equal... they are something less.  A servant is below a pet.  They are not lavished with attention, they are ignored unless needed.  Their thoughts and feelings are unimportant compared to the one they serve.  They enable their Mistress to live without being bogged down by the mundane.

When you think about it, outside of work, just how much time per week is spent running errands, performing chores, and tedious busywork?  For most of us, it is enough to keep our leisure time to a minimum, often choosing to relax and laze away simply to unwind from them.  If you think about the amount of motivation, ambition, and development of interests that falls by the wayside due to the mundane, it's rather disappointing.

While in most D/s situations there is some form of sharing done here, I believe most subs that are suited for lifestyle 24-7 are fine with the notion that the Domme should enjoy her time while the sub creates a situation that allows that to happen.  While sub burnout is possible, dynamics, rules, and consequences definitely help prevent that or at least slow its progress.

I won't lie though, even when T and I were practicing D/s, domestic service was something that really didn't work out for us.  A very huge part of this is her son... who, to be blunt, is quite the slob.  I don't mind cleaning up for her, but I would rather he learn to clean up after himself.

This caused a bit of friction over time, and after finding he was more comfortable tossing his dirty socks and garbage behind the couch rather than taking care of them properly, I began to protest.  Banana peels, yogurt containers, cups that had chocolate milk in them, etc. and yes, the couch was against a wall.  Too often it reminded me of that episode of the Simpsons where Marge polishes the living room to a shine, walks into the kitchen, forgets something, and back into the living room where it's trashed.  Six hours was the average before anything that I had cleaned up was in total disarray again.  After he decided it was more fun to piss into the bathtub rather than into the toilet (something he still does occasionally at age 17), I refused to clean the bathroom, citing that if he was going to do that, it should be his responsibility.  I continued to cook and clean in certain areas, but I stopped in any place that was prone to being destroyed in under a day.

It is strange that it was mostly my parental instincts that caused a breakdown in D/s on that front.  It is also something that caused me to lose some submissive pride over the years.  I'm not sure if this was reasonable on my part or one of my shortcomings, but it got to be too much to bear.