Monday, November 26, 2012

The subspace of the deep submissive

A lot of things have become clear in my mind since I wrote my entry on the deep submissive.  Actually, a lot of rather confusing feelings and responses now appear to make sense in how they are linked together into a system.  This system that I plan to explore in this entry is the subspace of the deep submissive.

As I described in the earlier entry, deep submissives are often misunderstood since their subspace is difficult to understand.  In most cases it's viewed simply that an erection = he enjoys it and flaccid = he doesn't enjoy it.  The psyche of the deep submissive while immersed in subspace is rather complicated, as his physical enjoyment (PE), emotional fulfillment (EF), and sexual response (SR) can be detached from one another and may or may not react together depending upon the D/s environment.

When a deep submissive experiences true pleasure it means his physical enjoyment, emotional fulfillment, and sexual response are connected.  Basically, this happens when it feels good, he feels good about it, and it turns him on.  An easy example of this is when he has pleased his Mistress and she allows him to have sex with her.

What makes the subspace of the deep submissive more complicated is when those things do not coincide.  This is mainly caused by the depth of the deep submissive's subspace.  When a deep submissive is immersed in a deep subspace, his world undergoes a fundamental change.  He undergoes major shifts in morality, ethics, and priority structure in his mind and these have a major effect on his EF component.

Here is a very brief and incomplete list of the rules governing a deep submissive's subspace to illustrate the idea:
The world is perfect when she gets everything she wants.
Everything that pleases her is right, everything that displeases her is wrong.
The submissive is valuable when he pleases her and worthless when he displeases her.
Pleasure is a gift granted by the Mistress.
Punishment is always justified.

The deep submissive will shift to a system of logic that reinforces the rules of his subspace.  This may sometimes give the appearance of doormat behavior, but in actuality it is his submissive pride dictating an almost impossibly high standard of service (his EF): he received the honor of being chosen by her so his service must be perfect at all times to prove he was the worthy choice.  Living under these rules brings a high level of shame and guilt upon any failure, and a failure is any time he wasn't perfect or she wasn't perfectly pleased by him.  This is also why a deep submissive is able to thrive under extremely strict rules since they give him a level of conduct to aspire for and he feels proud when he exceeds her expectations of him.

A deep submissive can accept and adapt to any new rule as long as it makes sense within his new logic base.  If she thinks his service suffers for a couple of days after an orgasm and she decides he should no longer have orgasms because of that, he may be disappointed but he will find a way to believe that is the correct course of action and is plenty fair since it will ensure he can better serve her.  If she physically punishes him for even the smallest of infractions, he will believe he deserved it and willingly accept it, sometimes welcoming it since it will improve his future performance (e.g. One spanking is more effective than ten lectures) and ease his guilt over failing to serve perfectly.  The sub's logic in this state can justify nearly anything that she wants to do.  If she chooses to beat him out of the blue, he can accept if it is to "remind him of his place," "to keep him focused," or "prevent future transgressions."

Oddly enough, this method of coping can often ruin true pleasure since his PE and SR are met, but his EF may disconnect if he doesn't feel like he deserves it.  Similarly, he may display masochistic behaviors during a punishment since his EF and SR drive his subspace when he feels like he deserves punishment even though he experiences zero (or negative) PE.

Dealing with this type of sub can be difficult for some Dommes since they sometimes do not understand the depth that his subspace reaches and how his mind works during those times.  Often the crueler and less tolerant she is, the better he will feel.  This is because he feels good about performing with a superb attention to detail and he knows that when he pleases her, she values having such a competent sub.  It will even make him love her more since he is thankful that she is willing to bring out the best in him, even if that involves pushing him to his absolute limits.  If it seems like he wishes to be denied pleasure, that is not really the case, he just only wishes to receive pleasure when he feels like he has earned it and deserves it.

Relationships of this nature may appear abusive to the outside world, but in most of the cases, the sub is sublimely happy and wouldn't trade his lifestyle for the world.  This also doesn't mean he is a doormat, since if she wants to enjoy his company, he will be that, if she wants to have vanilla  fun, he will be that.  What it does mean is that he can be whatever she wants him to be at any given time.