Thursday, July 13, 2017

Experimenting with Hypnosis

I've never been the type that has been able to be hypnotized.  That being said I'm sick of my brain feeling blocked and I have a friend currently delving into hypnosis so they have whipped up some audio training to try and help me out.

The idea we are going for is to instill a trigger word that will put me into and/or keep me in submissive mental space.  The chosen word is one that already plays upon some emotional triggers.

I'm hoping this might help, but it's tough to tell if there are actually things happening or if it is mostly wishful thinking and a healthy dose of placebo effect. 

In any case, it feels better trying to do something about my mental state than not doing anything.

Sunday, July 9, 2017

I love you so much that I ______.

I know that not all D/s practitioners are in loving relationships but many of us are.  I believe that submission encapsulates a large number of things, some of which match our desires completely and others which may carry a series of conditions or some reluctance and hesitation.

I have come across and experienced varying points of view on these subjects from both the Dominant and submissive sides and these ideas mesh better in some instances than in others.

The willing is always the easiest. 
I love you so much that I will dedicate my existence to your happiness.
I love you so much that I will do everything in my power to please you.
I love you so much that I will ______ to ______.

A lot of basic compatibility resides on this level.  Ideally, the submissive wants to give the things that the dominant wants to receive. 

The conditionals get a bit more complicated.
I love you so much that I would be willing to ______ to ______.

This wording has the ability to change the perceptions of the promised or desired act.  For a submissive, this wording generally implies some proof of devotion, love, or sacrifice. 
I love you so much that I would be willing to be put in chastity to make you happy.  
This translates into: I do not want to be put into chastity, but I would make that sacrifice if you desire it.  To take something less fetish-related: I love you so much that I would be willing to give up poker night with the guys to stay by your side.


I have seen some rather polarizing reactions from dominants on this sort of statement.  Well, I have seen polarizing reactions in vanilla relationships as well. 
Positive: This is a romantic gesture.
Negative: You don't really want to do it, so this is impure.

(Not to stereotype but many of you may have witnessed this first hand when someone asks their boyfriend/husband if they want to go to the craft store for scrap-booking supplies.)

It seems that many of the conditionals that end up with differing responses are often on mild to medium topics and are often a reflection of personality rather than something greater.

When getting into more important conditionals people tend to be a lot better with accepting reluctance or hesitation.
I love you so much that I would be willing to give up financial control if _______.
Requiring trust, a committed long-term relationship, a history of sound decision-making for the good of the relationship, and so on is seen as wise and prudent. 
 
Just some random thoughts.

Sardax's Venus in Furs

A big thanks to Vanessa at Queening Chairs for reminding me that I still hadn't purchased Sardax's Venus in Furs book.  Sardax is my favorite fetish artist of all time and served as one of my gateways into the realm of Femdom when I first stumbled upon his artwork circa 1997.  While his pay site is no longer going, I can say that his site was one of the handful of times that I had ever paid for "adult content" and I have even gone so far as to purchase most of the available works featuring his art (including ordering a number of publications from the UK).  When the book was released I was in a tight situation financially and buying anything beyond what was necessary (food, gasoline) wasn't really an option.

Unfortunately, if I want a hardcover edition of Venus in Furs, it looks like I will have to order from the UK once again.  In the meantime, I did purchase the Kindle Edition for $4. This version features ~10 amazingly beautiful drawings to go along with a new translation of the novel.  The hardcover version includes an additional 20 drawings and I may have to find a way to get it just for those.

I only read the first bit of the translation so far but I may post a review of it at some time down the line.  I will be curious to see how this translation compares during my favorite scenes from my previous experiences reading different translations.