Today

Tonight I'm feeling a bit lonely.  I had a really long day and almost got into several car accidents when people changed lanes without looking and nearly side-swiped me.  I'm not really sure but there were a lot of up and down adrenaline rushes/crashes following a night where I didn't sleep very well.

I stopped by a lot of stores today and while it was "warm" by our standards reaching the mid-20's, when following days of snow and temperatures in the teens or below something strange always happens on these days (and I don't just mean extra long lines at the car wash).  Women that are out and about tend to dress particularly well during these times.  It's like, when it's super cold they bundle up to the gills and don't worry about fashion and when it's "super warm" (e.g. 30's) they tend to wear laundry day clothes since it's sloppy as hell outside.  It's these days where it's warmer than it has been but still decently cold that things tend to spice up a bit.


The shapeless nylon parkas go away and the stylish yet practical ensembles make their way out of the closet once again.  Huge over-sized ski gloves and mittens are replaced with leather, wool, and cashmere gloves, and everything gets a little stream-lined, although prime for my strongest fetish, that being women in fur and leather apparel, boots, gloves, and certain styles of hats (these pre-date all of my submissive tendencies).

I wrote about this in some of my earliest posts (in the first 10 or 20 entries or so) on my blog.  My sissy fetish is all about the forced part of forced fem and humiliation.  I don't wish to ever pass for feminine, nor could I with my muscular build.  I am jealous at how women's clothing differs from men's clothing.

To put it bluntly, I'm attracted to nearly every part of a woman.  While eyes and mouth tend to be what makes me truly drawn in (in a superficial sense), I love breasts and curves.  I love hair that accents the overall shape of the figure.  I love some more interesting facial characteristics like a slightly turned up nose or some imperfect teeth and small moles.  I can't help but (peripherally) stare at shapely hips, thighs, and ass.  I love the proportional differences between men and women, shortened torso, longer legs, shorter arms, and (proportionately) longer necks.

How does this apply to being jealous of how clothing differs?  Well, women's clothing does two things that men's clothing doesn't do.  First, women's clothing is meant to tease the eyes.  It lures you.  A low cut blouse and you can't help but peak at the breasts.  Leggings and tights (or any tight fitting pants) have your eyes tracing upwards.  Tunic length tops (with leggings) keep you wanting to see more.  Skirts are so inviting.  Stretch tops show off the curves of the breast and back.  Even though I was really busy with errands today I noticed at least six women wearing stretch pants, knee high boots, and belted hip length coats.  They would walk in with a pair of leather gloves in hand and sunglasses on.  On days like these they know they look good and they know people notice it.

The second part is comfort.  Form and function become one in women's clothing designed for winter.  Men have a cotton shirt with a semi-rigid collar.  Women have a form fitting cashmere sweater that caresses the body with every movement, retains warmth without over-heating, and makes the breasts "pop."  Assuming you shop stores that are a cut above what you would find at an average mall (or utilize discount retailers like TJ Maxx), women's outerwear is almost always geared towards style, comfort, and warmth.  With men's clothing it's notable for its lack of style, lack of comfort, and just the warmth.  The luxury fabrics turn up more commonly for women and usually at a better price than similar items for men (if they are even available) and in a manner that is meant to compliment various outfits via different colors.  What's key here is this:  men aren't supposed to enjoy wearing it, they're just supposed to wear it and look either practical or established/sophisticated or scenester/hipster, or whatever. 

My love of the touch of fur (with a lot of outside help) pretty much made me the sissy I am today.  Aside from trapper hats (which have become trendy with women in the past two years) and hood trim, fur has pretty much vanished from men's apparel.  Match that with the political climate towards fur coming up through the late 80's and the 90's and a material that had been used for warmth for thousands of years pretty much vanished for men.

Even with the invention of synthetic fibers, fur (including sheepskin/shearling/etc.) is still as warm if not warmer (with less perspiration).  Even if a synthetic could be as warm, there's something missing... and that is the touch.  Natural fur just feels really good on the skin.  So in our post-thinsulate and abundant faux era, there's still a reason that earmuffs are made out of fur, sheepskin, etc. and that's because it feels good and it's incredibly warm.  With that in mind, while earmuffs were invented by a man with the intention of them being unisex, the only male earmuffs (that aren't feminine and passed off as unisex) are those fleece behind the head style, which are neither as warm nor pleasing to the touch. 

Now I am of the type that really doesn't bundle up much in winter.  I rarely zip up my coat.  I wear thin leather gloves.  I never wear hats, scarves, or boots.  I don't layer at all, nor wear any flannel or fleece.  I find many of those materials, especially acrylic, to be more irritating than anything else.  I over-heat and then sweat and then get colder and the material tends to rub in a bad way, making my head and neck itch.  Now if I wanted to dress for warmth and comfort, my options are extremely limited without going en femme.

This is kind of how things got started.  I got my first Mistress a merino wool cloche hat with a fur cuff trim that went over the ears, some merino wool gloves with fur cuffs at the wrist, and a fur scarf as a gift.  She absolutely loved them.  While modern fashion has dictated that fur trims are meant for style, they were in fact invented to help retain body heat at the points where the warm clothes end.  It was during a discussion similar to what I am writing now that she originally wanted me to be comfortable with wearing fur and she wanted me to enjoy it as she had learned to on that fateful day when she made me wear the things I got her.  I resisted but she "insisted" (giving me a couple of checks in the punishment log) and soon I was wearing them and she teased my face and chest with the ends of the scarf.  After several minutes she realized I wasn't saying anything.  My face was red, my eyes were pointed at the floor, my lip was twitching and I had a huge erection.  I couldn't speak, I could only nod or shake my head.  Fur became part of her power and she soon abandoned the idea of making me comfortable with it and began to exploit my discomfort. 

It was later that week when the conversation from my May 4th post took place and she ended up buying it even after that conversation. 

I don't really know where I'm going with this post, nor did I know when I started.  I just feel pretty lonely tonight (Mistress is working an overnight) and I don't have anyone to talk to or be affectionate with.

All I know is that I am grateful for today's weather since there were many women about in sexy boots, fur-trimmed coats and hats, and an abundance of nice sweaters and shapely form-fitting pants while indoors.