I feel a bit self-conscious posting this... but seeing as how my last post was about things that make me smile and to respect the author who took the time to write it, I will post it. I'm not usually good at receiving compliments. Every so often I receive some words from others that really touch my heart. They make me feel good for keeping this blog going over the years, even when I felt lonely.
This morning I received a message from a reader (with their permission to post this) as they didn't want it to get lost or buried in the comments of an older post. It makes me very glad that I chose to show more of my inner-self this year... my fears, insecurities, and pains.
Thank you, Jessica. Your words mean the world to me and when I read them this morning, I felt warm in my heart.
A fangirl love letter!
I considered a subject line for this message and I think what I said is most appropriate :) I'm writing to unabashedly gush about you and this is a love letter of sorts, albeit not a romantic love letter. I have a love for of the parts of you that you share with us (the readers) and your writing itself! This message has been a long time coming, but I've decided to write it to you now after giving much thought to this post in particular:
There are so many things I want to say about you, your blog and your writing. But this post in particular is a microcosm of how raw, emotional and open you are with your readers. It is also a testament that you can be open and honest with yourself and your readers and are willing to use your own blog for personal growth.
For me, the two most important factors that I look for in a personal blog are:
1) A willingness to express ones self without holding back. The blogger must be willing to be as open and raw as possible to give the reader a true sense of what's happening in the blogger's life.
2) The ability to express those thoughts in a thought provoking, articulate way and have a unique "voice".
Let me tell you about you :)
Many bloggers out there have one of those things or the other but not both. I subscribe to many, many blogs and many of them are written by bloggers that are extremely open and raw with their feelings. Those bloggers leave little left on the table, they share openly and are honest with their readers...they are as real as it comes. However, they don't write well from a technical standpoint and they have difficulty expressing their thoughts because of some deficiency...education, writing ability, truly knowing themselves, etc.
And there are bloggers are out there that write beautifully, but they carefully only let you see the sides of them that they want you to see. Sometimes they hold back their fears, dreams or thoughts. Sometimes they withhold information that would paint themselves in a negative light (or paint others in a negative light). There are many, many ways that a writer can be withholding, these are just a few examples. The point I'm trying to make is that it's obvious (to me anyway) that they're holding things back and that leads to a less honest and open experience for the reader.
However, fursissy is the total package :)
I subscribe to many, many femdom/bdsm themed blogs---100's! Of course I haven't read every single blog being currently published out there, but I say with great confidence that your blog is the GOLD STANDARD by which every other blog in this genre should be judged.
There is simply no other blogger out there that is as emotionally open as you are. You are so emotionally raw and splayed open at times on your blog that I can feel your emotions dripping off the pages as I read them. You're so honest with yourself and your readers that I can sense the bravery that it took to convey some of the thoughts that you've presented to us. Yes, you keep your anonymity behind the keyboard, but the parts of "your world" that you let the reader in to is at times astonishing and there simply is no other blogger out there that does what you do and to the extent that you do it. And you do it to not only share with us, you do it for self reflection and personal growth. You're obviously a very sensitive person and you still do it even though you're opening yourself up to criticism and being rejected. You take emotional risks that others simply aren't willing to take, all in the name of honesty, transparency and personal growth. There are few very bloggers out there that take the risks that you do :)
But there are even fewer who do that AND can write like you can (the total is one: you!). You give us everything that I described above, but you're able to do it through your beautifully written words. You are articulate, thoughtful, mechanically sound and have a beautiful flow to your posts. You're obviously very smart and highly educated and your posts often read like having a conversation with Socrates at times. You're easily able to convey your innermost thoughts and questions and I never feel slowed down by how you write or the words you use. I have two degrees in English and I often get frustrated by bloggers' mechanical errors, misuse of the language and the inability to convey their true thoughts/meaning. I've never had that issue with you, you're as technically sound as they come!
You need to know that I consider you to be the absolute best femdom blogger out there and that every blogger out there should read your blog to know what a fantastic blog looks like! I know that your life has been very difficult at times and that you have anxiety and fear that you're not worthy in many aspects of your life. But if there is one thing I want you to take away from this love letter is that your blog is not one of those aspects: no matter what criticism anyone ever hands down to you about your blog, know that you give so much to me and your other readers and we absolutely adore what you're willing to share with us and how you share it.
Thank you for being so wonderful!!!
P.S. I considered just posting this letter as a comment on your blog. But I didn't for two reasons:
1) I didn't want it to get lost in the minutiae of the comments of any one particular post. If you want to ensure your readers see this letter you should make it a separate post and you have my permission to use this letter however you like.
2) This is a highly personal letter and I didn't know if you'd be embarrassed to have it posted publicly. I know how humble you are and how careful you are to not come across as patting yourself on the back.
Just know that I'm happy for the world to see what I've written and I'm leaving it up to you about whether or not to share what I've written. I'm perfectly happy for this to be a private moment between the two of us if that is what you choose to do.
You are truly a special person and writer and I needed you to know that.