Author’s
Note: This bonus chapter is a mock Question and Answer session done
by Cassandra on her blog. It could take place at any time after Arc
1.
---------------
Cassandra’s
Blog Bonus Chapter - Q & A: Feminization
Dear
Ms. C.
Why
do you feminize your sub in such a way when he obviously dislikes it?
Shouldn’t that kind of thing be consensual? Isn’t humiliating
him like that a bit abusive? It seems cruel and unfair.
-subguy89
It seems I get asked questions like these about once a month. If you
read my earlier Question & Answer posts you will see that I have
answered these questions in some capacity several times over.
Our lifestyle is one that was built up slowly over deep levels of
love and trust. We entered into this relationship with both eyes
open. It was 100% consensual and I made no secret that I expected
his total obedience. He promised he would do whatever it took to
make me happy. I don’t understand how it can appear unfair for us
to simply do what we agreed to do. He made his choice just as I made
mine.
Cruel? Certainly. I first feminized him as part of one of his old
fantasies and to display his new role in our household as my maid. I
continue to feminize him because he dislikes it. It is a symbol of
my control and power over him. It’s easy to make a sub do what he
wants to do. I like watching a sub squirm as I order them to do what
they do not want to do. Partly why I keep changing up his uniform is
that I never want him to get used to it and have it feel normal.
I love watching him blush and the expression his face makes when he
feels shame. I love seeing him squirm and writhe in his own skin
when I show him off to my friends. This brings me hours of amusement
every single day. I am absolutely certain if you asked him that he
would rather suffer for my amusement than feel normal and deny me
that pleasure. This is part of how we show our love for each other.
Humiliating? Absolutely. Abusive? Hardly.
If you wish to judge me for how the dynamics of our relationship
differ from your ideas that is your loss. We have had eight happy
years together to evolve us to this state and it is unlikely we will
resemble some one-off BDSM scene between two parties who barely know
each other.
END
Cass states her case very well. SO much of what a dominant female does is a mystery to many readers. They regularly overlook the concept of consensuality, or simply can't understand its implications. It's almost as confusing to people as the word "fairness". I'm sure you know what I mean.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Lady Grey.
DeleteI do know exactly what you mean and I know you receive quite a few comments on your blog on those topics. I'm not sure why it's such a hurdle for many... "from a vanilla perspective" doesn't really apply when the situation is anything but vanilla. In other cases I believe people get hung up on the idea of D/s as being a singular event with consent required on each occasion. It is much easier to understand the concept of "within the standards that we agreed upon," but I believe people occasionally struggle with the idea of someone willingly subjecting themselves to that type of environment.
Take care.