Thursday, May 19, 2016

On Display Part 3

What followed was sort of strange.

Although I had been around T's friends quite a bit, I really didn't know any of them and none of them really knew anything about me at all even after several months.  I know that several were very impressed with my behavior and courteous nature.  All of the friends I was introduced to were single and ranged from age 28 to 50.  Most were divorced and had children of varying ages.  All of them were a bit distraught with dating and relationships.

At some point T had each of them over and talked with them about relationships, love, men, and so on (To be clear here, these were 5 different evenings and not all at once). At some point, T called me over and inserted me into the conversation.  "Tell them your thoughts on this," she instructed. 

I have been giving relationship advice for a very long time... starting at age 16 or so.  Being stuck in the friend zone put me as the prime shoulder to cry on and hear things out while giving my thoughts on the subject and this experience taught me something strange... that for many women, how they go about relationships at 16 doesn't change very much by 45.

As I spoke to them, I echoed the majority of the sentiments I had about men, love, submission, and D/s that I had spoken about with T when we first met, although I removed any Femdom or fetish details in this version.  I have a pretty developed philosophy, so my soap box usually took about 90 minutes.  They would occasionally pause to ask a question, but for the most part, they sat back and listened intently.  I will try to give a very brief recap.  The actual words were more eloquent and with a better and more appropriate flow.
-Assume all men are jerks until proven otherwise.  Nearly all will be chasing easy sex.
-Assume all men are children inside and will be selfish and throw tantrums unless someone takes charge.
-It is better to be the one who chooses than the one who is chosen.  You can pick the ones that will try the hardest and aren't at the mercy of who decided to approach you.
-50/50 balance is destined to fail.  It has to be at least 51/49 to keep things flowing as someone's will must always win instead of reaching a stalemate.  If you want things your way, be the one with the power. 

At some point T would steer me down a different route.  "Tell her how you think men should act in relationships."  The summary version:
-A man should put her happiness and pleasure first and foremost.  He should adore her like she is the most important thing in the world and make her believe it.  A man's devotion can be measured by how much he is willing to change himself for the better to make sure her happiness remains paramount. 
-A man should show his love openly and affection should flow freely.  He should notice things and give frequent compliments.  His thoughts should always include what he can do to make her happy.
-A man should feel lucky every day that he is with her and that appreciation should show in every action and gesture.  Hold nothing back.

"How do women make that happen?" she steered again.
-It's up to a woman to ensure that a man doesn't stray from his ideal path.  She is sexually superior and can overpower him in this regard, using sex as a weapon to ensure his behavior.
-Women have to take charge and save men from their selfish and stupid shit.  Jerking off to porn constantly instead of channeling his sexual energies for her, spending $5k on a car stereo, getting obsessed by some pointless hobby and tuning out the rest of the world... these are male behaviors and benefit no one.  
-Seek the men that you don't find in bars or clubs; men who don't wreak of testosterone.   Find the shy, sensitive guy that will love and cherish you and make you his world, he's the one who will feel lucky to have you.

By the end I noticed a split.  Massage girl and the one who didn't want anything during our first meeting (I later found out it was because she too thought I was short and fugly and didn't want me to touch her) thought I was full of shit.  Back rub and foot rub #2 were very intrigued (and turned on).  Foot rub #1 with the tall boots was rolling with it, a huge grin on her face.

Massage girl and no touch retorted with how they could only be attracted to a tall man with a good body and would take charge and be "manly."  No touch went on to say that he had to have a full head of her, perfect teeth, a good job, and big goals for his life.  Several weeks later she began showing up with her new boyfriend.  He was tall and muscular but was also unemployed and mooching off her, had a Charlie Brown head of hair, and roughly 7 teeth.  I guess some compromises had to be made? Massage girl remained single except for a random smattering of one-night stands that she thought would be more.  T would share with me the exploits of both after that as T didn't invite them around much after this but they would still talk on the phone.  I remember hearing about a sob story of how she "even let him fuck her up the ass and then he never called and blocked her number." 

Back rub and foot rub #1 enjoyed what I had to say, but countered with "Men like that don't exist."  I assured them that they did, they just had to look differently.  Going out to a club, waiting for a guy to hit on her, and sleeping with them that first night wasn't working very well.  What followed was a string of excuses that would make a 23 year old millennial moving back in with their parents because they can't hold a job blush.  I knew though, they weren't disagreeing with me, they just had low self-esteem and were too proud to say that being the one to choose and the risk of rejection that entails was too hard for them.  They would end up as works in progress. 

Foot rub #1 was bubbly.  "Sign me up!"  She asked me how to make that sort of thing happen and T stepped in for me.  I always get heated an animated when talking about these subjects.  T patted her thigh and I knelt on the floor next to her.  She placed her hand on my head and guided it to her lap.  I heard T ask her friend if she knew what Domination and submission was.  Adrenaline gone, I started to drift into subspace and zoned out with my head on T's lap. 

Foot rub #1 was a black woman in her late 40's that had moved here from the deep south.  Her mannerisms were a bit of a stereotype but very animated and beaming with energy.  Every so often my trance was broken by her voice, "So you're saying that he's one of those submissive things you're talking about?   I have GOT to get me one of those."  As T continued, she didn't reveal anything deeper about me (I started listening after this outburst), just that I truly enjoyed being able to serve them in that way and that it made me feel good to please.  "But I thought like that Domination and submission stuff was supposed to be kinky and shit?"  T replied with, "It is, but the orgasms are amazing."

"So what kind of kinky things is he into?"
"Well..."  I opened my eyes and tensed up a little, "That's a secret... but let's just say I bet it would make you laugh."
"Aww shit, you can't just drop a bomb like that and then not even tell me.  I'm not embarrassing you, am I honey?" she asked, directed at me.  I gently shook my head.
"Maybe some day," replied T.

After that T introduced her to collarme and she started meeting subs.  I only saw her two more times in person, both in passing.  Once I overheard, "The sex is great, but T, I can't find one that will do all the things that he does," in reference to me.  That made me feel good.  She ended up moving far across town so when T saw her from there on out it was usually without me and they would mostly shop together.  T had gotten her to start wearing fur and showed me a picture, telling me she loved it.  After a while, they lost touch and I heard she found a man and they moved back to the south to be closer to family.  This was the most I had ever been "outed," but I didn't really mind given the circumstances and environment.

On a side note, several months later massage girl approached T and realized some of the things I said might have been right.  Their friendship didn't last much longer though as it soon became clear that she was a pathological liar.


  1. First a compliment for your blog. It is wonderful to read.
    My Mistress is gradually displaying our D/s life. She was hesitating at first afraid what her family and friends would say. The first display was when we where shopping for groceries. We were standing in line when my Mistress , in our conversation asked me what I was. I had to answer (and I did) that I was her sissy slave. I had to repeat that 2 times. She wanted to remind me, because I suggested something and I was out of order. The women in front of us in line turner and complimented Mistress about how she had a well trained husband. I bit with a joke. The two started to talk and my Mistress openly said that I was her slave. This was the first time and I was in shock and felt humiliated. Karin, the woman we met in that line, became a good friend of Mistress and knows everything about our 24/7 Mistress / slave relation.
    After that Mistress never admitted, by my knowledge to friends or family about the Mistress / slave relation but displayed her dominance over me very clearly. Al friends and family knows she constantly giving me orders and directions that I follow to the letter. They make remarks about my dedication to her and that she must be proud. Mistress advertises with all services I do for her like a weekly pedicure, every morning I make the breakfast en serve it into her bed, cleaning her car, do the hand washing of her Lingerie and pantyhose, drive her to and from her appointments, etcetera.
    Mistress has become so relaxed about her dominance over me that she now lend me out her girlfriends for all kind of tasks like mowing the lawn, pedicuring, cooking, foot massage.
    I struggled with the idea, anybody knowing about me being submissive especially me being her slave. I learned that it’s OK and I ‘am now very proud that she is my Mistress and that I ‘am her obedient slave. But still only Karin knows about me being a slave to my wonderful Mistress. The rest sees that she (Mistress) wears the pants in our relation and that just fine!

    1. Thank you very much for sharing and I'm happy you are enjoying the blog.

      I've had many public tidbits, but never something that forward. Usually if I got out of line I might be ordered to be silent and/or look at the ground but nothing beyond that in regards to reactive discipline.

      I have had fashion magazines held up to me while in line, open to something in particular and had T say, "You'd look cute in that." F would get close on occasion, if we were out shopping she would tease which items she might have me wear, although she did threaten once that if I didn't improve my attitude that she would buy a pair of neon pink earmuffs they had and ask the woman at the register to cut the tags off so that I could wear them out.

      Overall, having a total stranger tell Mistress that I'm well-behaved in public is something that makes me feel really good inside though.

      I've never been explicitly lent out when Mistress wasn't present though. K had a friend she wanted to "tag team" me with but didn't trust her if we had been alone. F was waaaaaay too possessive to allow anyone else to "enjoy" me, although there are certain instances with other local Dommes where I could picture her allowing me if she received something else in trade.

      I'm glad you are fine that she wears the pants. I feel that way as well. If someone gives me shit about it, I simply say, "I'm happy, she's happy, what's wrong with that?"